Sunday, February 1, 2009

In Between

I hate it when I'm stucked in between, when I have to be the middle person. Unfortunately, for some mysteriously unknown reasons, I have always play that role my whole life. I was in between my Mom and Dad, between my brother and brother-in-law, between my Mom and sisters etc etc. The reasons that I can NEVER be a successful middle person are that:
  1. I do not like to lie.
  2. I am not a "two-headed snake" who says different things in front of different person.
  3. I cannot take the pressure.
  4. I cannot take the blame.

One of the main responsibility of a middle person is to pass messages. And believe me, those messages are nasty. I'd be forced to say means things to people whom I care about. It's difficult.

I was in a similar situation recently. I didn't protest. I guess I was too tired. When I heard the debate from both parties, seemed to me both had their points. I didn't know what to think. I didn't know which side to choose. I always have trouble deciding when it comes to this. When I couldn't take it any longer, I talked to a friend on the phone. I felt both better and worse after that. Better because he was there to share my suffering; worse because of his disapproval. He asked me not to think too much, but...

I guess there are some things in life that can't be helped. Or rather, I'm in a stage where I no longer care, or am too tired to care. I'll just go with the flow.

5 comments:

Lollipop said...

loo, so sorry to hear that.
it must be terrible.
the point is, y would u worry which side to take?
jus worry about yr own life, not theirs.
learn to be detached, especially frm things that makes u unhappy.
u have the right to do anything to "protect yrself".
in this case, get detached.
instead of listening to any party, jus say calmly to them (when they start to tell their side of the story), tell them to stop, tell them u do not want any part in this and that u no longer wish to be sandwiched in any way.

confessions of a medical student said...

don't let it upset you too much.. perhaps sometimes, it's better to let it all out than keep it all inside... find time to let your family know that you don't like to be the messenger all the time.... that you love them and would not want to hurt them or see them argue.. unless you let them know, they may not know that you feel terrible in this situation...

shinloo, take care..

MODERN ROBINSON CRUSOE said...

I'm also at times being "middle-person" btw my mum & the other family members..Can emphatised with you on that.....

Anonymous said...

no wonder u are moody

thE gEOgrAphicAlly blind said...

thanks you guys... i'll be fine :)