love

Received an email from Soo Ngoh last night. I was at Zilin's so we read it together. It kind of touched me. And I believe Zilin as well. It's a philosophy about love. I've had it copied and pasted here:

爱的感觉，总是在一开始觉得很甜蜜，
总觉得多一个人陪、多一个人帮你分担，
你终於不再孤单了，至少有一个人想著你、恋著你，
不论做什么事情，
只要能一起，就是好的，
但是慢慢的，随著彼此的认识愈深，
你开始发现了对方的缺点，
於是问题一个接著一个发生，
你开始烦、累，甚至想要逃避，
有人说爱情就像在捡石头，
总想捡到一个适合自己的，
但是你又如何知道什么时候能够捡到呢？
她适合你，那你又适合她吗?
其实，爱情就像磨石子一样，
或许刚捡到的时候，你不是那么的满意，
但是记住人是有弹性的，
很多事情是可以改变的，
只要你有心、有勇气，
与其到处去捡未知的石头，
还不如好好的将自己已经拥有的石头磨亮磨，你开始磨了吗？
很多人以为是因为感情淡了，
所以人才会变得懒惰。
错！
其实是人先被惰性征服，
所以感情才会变淡的。

在某个聚餐的场合, 有人提议多吃点虾子对身体好，
这时候有个中年男人忽然说「十年前，当我老婆还是我的女朋友的时候，她说要吃十只虾，我就剥二十只给她！
现在，如果她要我帮她剥虾壳，开玩笑！我连帮她脱衣服都没兴趣了，还剥虾壳咧！

听到了吗？明白了吗？
难怪越来越多人只想要谈一辈子的恋爱，却迟迟不肯走入婚姻。
因为，婚姻容易让人变得懒惰。
如果每个人都
懒得讲话、
懒得倾听、
懒得制造惊喜、
懒得温柔体贴，
那么夫妻或是情人之间，
又怎么会不渐行渐远渐无声呢？
所以请记住：
有活力的爱情，
是需要适度殷勤灌溉的，
谈恋爱，更是不可以偷懒的喔！

有一对情侣，相约下班後去用餐、逛街，可是女孩因为公司会议而延误了， 当她冒著雨赶到的时候已经迟到了30多分钟， 他的男朋友很不高兴的说：
你每次都这样，现在我甚么心情也没了， 我以後再也不会等你了！ 刹那间，女孩终於决堤崩溃了， 她心里在想：或许，他们再也没有未来了

同样的在同一个地点，另一对情侣也面临同样的处境； 女孩赶到的时候也迟到了半个钟头，他的男朋友说：我想你一定忙坏了吧！
接著他为女孩拭去脸上的雨水，并且脱去外套盖在女孩身上， 此刻，女孩流泪了, 但是流过她脸颊的泪却是温馨的。

你体会到了吗？
其实爱、恨往往只是在我们的一念之间！

爱不仅要懂得宽容更要及时， 很多事可能只是在於你心境的转变罢了！
懂了吗？
当有个人爱上你，而你也觉得他不错。
那并不代表你会选择他。
我们总说：我要找一个你很爱很爱的人，才会谈恋爱。
但是当对方问你，怎样才算是很爱很爱的时候，
你可能无法回答他，因为你自己也不知道。

没错，我们总是以为，我们会找到一个自己很爱很爱的人。
可是後来，当我们猛然回首，我们才会发觉自己曾经多么天真。
假如从来没有开始，你怎么知道自己会不会很爱很爱那个人呢？
其实，很爱很爱的感觉，是要在一起经历了许多事情之後才会发现的。
或许每个人都希望能够找到自己心目中百分之百的伴侣，
但是你有没有想过在你身边会不会早已经有人默默对你付出很久了，只是你没发 觉而已呢？
所以，还是仔细看看身边的人吧！
他或许已经等你很久喽！

当你爱一个人的时候，爱到八分绝对刚刚好。
所有的期待和希望都只有七八分；剩下两三分用来爱自己。
如果你还继续爱得更多，很可能会给对方沉重的压力，让彼此喘不过气来， 完全丧失了爱情的乐趣。

所以请记住，
喝酒不要超过六分醉，
吃饭不要超过七分饱，
爱一个人不要超过八分

那天朋友问我：到底该怎么做才算是爱一个人呢？
我笑著跟他说：其实每个人的爱情观都不一样，说对了叫开导，但就怕说错反倒变成误导。那就糟糕了！

如果你也正在为爱迷惘，或许下面这段话可以给你一些启示：
爱一个人，要了解，也要开解；
要道歉，也要道谢；
要认错，也要改错；
要体贴，也要体谅；
是接受，而不是忍受；
是宽容，而不是纵容；
是支持，而不是支配；
是慰问，而不是质问；
是倾诉，而不是控诉；
是难忘，而不是遗忘；
是彼此交流，而不是凡事交代；
是为对方默默祈求，
而不是向对方诸多要求；
可以浪漫，但不要浪费；
可以随时牵手，但不要随便分手。

祝'愿天下有情人终成眷属!!!!!!!

For the benefit of those who are Chinese illiterate, I've directly translated it. I'm not a very good translator though but I feel that it's an obligation to share this with you people. So here goes:

Love, at the very beginning it's always sweet
There's always a person to be there for you, to share everything with you
You're not alone anymore, at least there's a person who loves you, who thinks of you
Whatever you do,
Long as you're together, everything is well
But then, as you know each other better,
You'd begin to notice his flaws
Thus problems arise one after another
You begin to feel troubled, tired, and you want to escape
People say it's like picking up little pebbles
You want to pick up The One that's suitable for youself
But how would you know when you'd find one?
If she's The One for you, are you The One for her?
Well, love is like polishing pebbles
When you first picked up the pebble, you may not feel satisfied
But humans are flexible
A lot of things can be changed
Long as you have the heart, and courage
If you want to go around picking up unknown pebbles,
Wouldn't you rather polish up the pebble that's already in your hands?
People think because the feeling subsided
Thus they become lazy
Wrong!
It's actually people tend to be lazy
And causes the feeling to subside

In a dinner gathering, at one point someone mentioned that eating shrimps is good for health
A middle-aged man then said, "Ten years ago, when my wife was still my girlfriend, if she said she wants to eat ten shrimps, I'd peel twenty for her. Now, she wants me to do that? No way! I don't even have interest to take off her clothes."

Understand?
It's no wonder why people nowadays don't fancy an early marriage
This is because, marriage makes people lazy
If everyone is
Lazy to talk
Lazy to listen
Lazy to create surprises
Lazy to be gentle and considerate
Then I'd be surprise if they don't go their separate ways
So please remember
An active romantic relationship
Needs sufficient nourishment
To be in a relationship
You can't be lazy

A couple had decided to go for a dinner after work. But the girl was late because of an office meeting. She was wet from the rain and was late for 30 minutes. Her boyfriend was very unhappy and said, "You are always like this. I will not wait for you anymore." At that moment the girl totally broke down, she thought, "Maybe, we don't have a future together."

The same situation, same place, same time. The girl was also late for 30 minutes. Her boyfriend said to her, "You must be very tired." He then wiped the rain water from her face and put on a coat for her. At that moment, the girl cried too. But the tears that rolled down her cheeks are warm, so as her heart.

Can you understand?
Between love and hate, there's just one fine line.

Love needs forgiveness and timing. It all depends on how you think.
When a person falls in love with you, and you think he's a fine guy
That doesn't mean you'd pick him
You say, "I want to find a guy whom I love very much, before I can commit."
But when asked, how would you consider that you love very much?
You may not be able to answer, because you can't

That's right. We always think we'd find the person whom we love very very much.
But when we look back, we'd find ourselves were indeed very naive
If it was never started, how would you know you wouldn't love him very very much?
The feeling of love is being discovered, only after you've been with him through ups and downs
You're hoping to find The One
But maybe, just maybe, someone has already been there all along, just that you never noticed.
So, take a look around
Maybe he's been waiting for a very long time

When you love someone, love him 80%
The hopes and expectations, make them 80%, the remaining 20% is for you to love yourself
If you love him too much, you may form a kind of pressure, causing both to suffocate

A friend once asked me, "How do you love someone?"
I told him,"Everyone has a different perception for love. I wouldn't want to mislead you."

Best wishes for all the lovebirds in the world

There are a part at the end which i decided not to do the translation. I regret to say it's something the Chinese illiterate can't appreciate. So I'd remain as it is. Anyway, hope you'd feel what I feel after reading.